La Voix Off

For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health.  It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

• Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 
• Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 
• Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 
• Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
• Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

Conclusion:  Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.